No One Mourns The Wicked
Good news! The Witch, she's dead!
Come out, come out, she's gone!
The wickedest witch there ever was
The enemy of all of us here in Oz
[SOMEONE IN THE CROWD, spoken]
Look! It's Glinda!
[GLINDA, spoken]
It's good to see me isn't it!
No need to respond, that was rhetorical.
Fellow Ozians
[sung] Let us be glad
Let us be grateful
Let us rejoicify that goodness could subdue
The wicked workings of you-know-who
Isn't it nice to know?
The truth we all bеlieve'll by and by
No one mourns the Wicked
[ANOTHER PERSON]
No one cries, "They won't return"
[ALL]
No one lays a lily on their grave
The good man scorns the Wicked
[3 WOMEN]
Through their lives, our children learn
[ALL]
What we miss when we misbehave
​
And Goodness knows the Wicked's lives are lonely
Goodness knows the Wicked die alone
It just shows, when you're wicked
Yes, Goodness knows the Wicked's lives are lonely
Goodness knows the Wicked cry alone
They reap only what they've sown
Or do they have Wickedness thrust upon them?
After all, the Wicked Witch had a childhood
She had a father, who by the way, had been appointed Governor of Munchkinland
And she had a mother, as so many do
How I hate to go and leave you lonely
That's alright, it's only just one night
[GOVERNOR THROPP]
But know that you're here in my heart
And, like every family, they had their secrets
​
Have another drink, my dark-eyed beauty
I've got one more night left here in town
So have another drink of green elixir
And we'll have ourselves a little mixer
Have another little swallow, little lady
But from the moment the witch was born, she was, well...
​
​
​
It's coming
[GOVERNOR THROPP, spoken]
Now?
[MIDWIFE, spoken]
The baby's coming
[GOVERNOR THROPP, spoken]
And how
[MIDWIFE, spoken]
I see a nose
[GOVERNOR THROPP, spoken]
I see a curl
[GOVERNOR THROPP & MIDWIFE]
It's a healthy, perfect, lovely, little
​
[MIDWIFE ASSISTANT #1]
Sweet Oz
​
[MELENA, spoken]
What is it? What's wrong?
[MIDWIFE]
How can it be?
[GOVERNOR THROPP]
What does it mean?
[MIDWIFE]
It's atrocious
[MIDWIFE ASSISTANT #2]
It's obscene
[GOVERNOR THROPP & MIDWIFE]
Like a froggy, ferny cabbage
The baby is unnaturally
[ALL]
Green
So you see, it couldn't have been easy
Now, at last, she's dead and gone
Now, at last, there's joy throughout the land
Goodness knows the Wicked die alone
​